Parenting a troubled teen can sometimes feel like trying to weather a perfect storm.
When kids make bad decisions, get in trouble with the law, and face juvenile criminal charges, parents worry. It consumes their thoughts, affects their sleep, and makes every single decision a challenge.
Let’s be real…
Parents are often so focused on what’s happening with their child that they forget about their own needs. But mental and emotional health is crucial for parents too. It allows them to be strong and engaged for their child.
What’s Inside:
- The Impact of Legal Stress on Parents
- Why Self-Care is Necessary
- Healthy Coping Mechanisms Parents Can Practice
- Establishing a Support Network for the Family
The Impact of Legal Stress on Parents
It’s no surprise that legal troubles with a child are incredibly stressful for parents.
Studies back up what many parents already know. According to the Journal of Child and Family Studies, parents who had a child involved with the juvenile court system showed elevated mental health symptoms. Over a third had clinically significant symptoms. No one wants that for themselves or their child.
It seems to be getting worse too…
FBI crime data shows that nearly 10% more juveniles were accused of violent crimes in 2023 compared to 2022. If your child has any part in a legal incident, you’re not alone.
It’s important to remember that parents do not have to shoulder the burden alone.
The emotional strain when a child faces juvenile criminal charges includes shame, guilt, anger, and fear. Working with a qualified juvenile criminal charges lawyer in Denver, CO can alleviate the stress of juvenile court. But the personal toll on mental health still needs to be managed.
Parents cannot continue to pour into everyone around them while neglecting themselves. Self-care for parents during a teen’s legal troubles is not a luxury. It’s a necessity.
Why Self-Care is Necessary
Putting self-care last is a common parenting theme.
Parents tend to throw themselves fully into the legal process, counseling, and guidance of their teen. The rest of their lives fall by the wayside. Sleep, relationships, and work all suffer in the process.
The thing many people are missing is that the emotional wellbeing of parents matters.
Kids, even teenagers, know when their parents are stressed. When parents are calm and able to manage their own reactions, it sets a different tone for the entire family. Tensions can lower and parents are better able to make decisions that are in their child’s best interest.
The health of parents has a direct impact on their child and their child’s situation.
This means parents should not be neglecting their own emotional health. Self-care is about being prepared for what lies ahead. It’s not about running from the problem.
Healthy Coping Mechanisms Parents Can Practice
Parents who are taking care of their own mental health are better able to handle the stress of a troubled teen.
The following are some of the most effective techniques for parents to learn and practice. Each tip has been shown to have a positive impact on overall wellbeing.
Set Healthy Boundaries
Parents must understand boundaries are healthy.
This includes not only household rules around what is acceptable behavior, but also when to step back and let things happen. Parents do not need to solve every problem their teenager creates.
Healthy boundaries include:
- Having established rules for everyone in the home
- Letting kids experience natural consequences for choices
- Shielding other family members from chaos when possible
- Understanding when outside help is needed
Boundaries are healthy not punishment.
Practice Stress Management Techniques Daily
Daily stress will build up if it’s not managed.
Daily stress management techniques, like the ones below, prevent parents from burning out. Remember you do not need hours of expensive meditation or workshops. It’s the daily consistency that matters.
Consider these options:
- A 10 minute morning walk
- Deep breathing before stress-inducing conversations
- Journaling for 5 minutes each day
- Turn off the news and social media habit
Try one every day to create a routine. A little every day is better than nothing or even binge efforts.
Seek Professional Support
Do not be afraid to talk to a therapist or counselor.
Parents sometimes feel shame around needing help. But therapists see families in crisis all the time. There is no judgment waiting for parents who need support.
Family therapy can help parents and their child stay on track. The sessions help parents communicate with teens about emotions and reactions.
Connect With Other Parents
Isolation only magnifies problems.
Connecting with another parent who understands the situation is extremely helpful. Support groups for parents exist with families in the same situation.
Peer support can give parents:
- Judgment-free understanding
- Practical advice from those in the trenches
- Emotional validation and support
- Hope through other parents’ success stories
Parents of troubled teens do not have to go it alone.
Focus On Factors You Can Control
Parents cannot control the legal process.
Court dates, judges, and many of their child’s decisions will be outside their influence. Parents who focus on these factors quickly get anxious and frustrated.
Instead, channel your energy into what you can control. This includes your own emotions, household routines, and stress management. Changing focus reduces anxiety.
Establish a Support System for the Family
A good support system makes a world of difference.
Support can come from family, friends, professionals, and community organizations. It takes effort to build a network but the payoff is worth it.
Look for resources like:
- Family therapists who work with adolescents
- Parent support groups (online or in person)
- Religious or community support
- School counselors
The strongest families know when to lean on others.
Maintain Hope For The Future
Troubled teens recover.
Many successful adults had rough teenage years. A difficult phase does not define a teen’s future. With the right support and intervention, kids can learn from mistakes.
Hope for the future can carry parents through court, treatment programs, and relapses.
Bringing It All Together
Parenting a troubled teen is one of the hardest things a parent can go through.
The stress of juvenile criminal charges, court dates, and worry about a child’s future can really take a toll on parents. But those who are proactive in their own mental and emotional health do better.
Remember:
- Self-care is necessary, not selfish
- Professional support can help the whole family
- Connecting with other parents reduces isolation
- Focus on what you can control
- Hope is essential to get through it all
Parents who take care of themselves are best equipped to take care of their children. Start with one small action today. Your family’s future depends on a parent who can stay calm in the middle of the storm.